So I uploaded the weekend pics last night, but apparently Sohhoverit has something against digital photos and wouldnt show whole pics. That woulda been fine if all yall wanted to see was the sweaty elbow of some fat dude at the club, or the dandruff closeup of the chick with the crooked parts in her head, but since I know thats not the objective, I took it down. However, I got the blog god on the job and he’ll be resizing or reformatting or re-something-ing so the shits will be viewable. In the meantime, put your coffee down (Persia LOL) and laugh at this nut below…..
DO NOT EAT PRINGLES FAT FREE POTATO CHIPS. THEY WILL GREASE YOUR ASS.
Date: 2006-07-17, 2:10AM PDT
Don’t even fucking say a word. I like potato chips, and can’t eat them very much or I’ll get fat.
I tried out these Pringles Fat-Free chips because they were super low-cal. BBQ flavor. the fuck.
The can said they had 70 calories per serving, which meant the whole can had 490 calories inside total. I could munch through a can in a day with my lunch, dinner, etc. So I got several cans, and began enjoying one a day for the past four days. But what they dont fucking tell you…
Except in tiny print you cant read without a fucking electron microscope
…is that the primary ingredient is something called “olean” which I have since learned is Latin for “Unwashable & Indestructible Ass Grease.”
Oh Yeah. I’m not even kidding.
So today, while I’m standing in the living room debating whether or not Laundry or Dishes will get done first, I get the urge to fart. I live alone, so sweet. I let the honk loose and its wrong. Something just sounded wrong. I know my own wind, and I have never farted a sound that sounded like a fart wrapped in a pillow.
Oh yes, something was very wrong. I had just shat myself. But this evil olean makes shitting yourself sound almost like a regular fart, and had I not been particularly attentive, it could easily have gone unnoticed, I’m telling you. THAT’s how utterly covert and evil this olean stuff is. What the fuck?! What if I’d gone out to hang with friends or gone for a drive, what then?
So I walk carefully to the bathroom and disrobe. before I even sit on the toilet, I wad paper and carefully wipe from the front. Sure enough, it was light brown, and had the texture of soft spackle. You fucking Pringle bastards.
I sat down and pushed a bit, and lo, out came a jet that I didnt even feel an urge for one minute earlier. It piled in the bowl like brown marshmallow fluff.
The problem rose when I tried to wipe. I went through a whole fucking roll of TP and could not get it all off me. So.
I jumped in the shower. Yep, its gross, but it had to be done. There I stood, water pouring down, cheeks spread, and using my own hand to make certain I’m clean.
That was when I discovered that after using my hand to wipe myself (before I soaped the area) my hand came back covered in some sort of transparent grease. It was so fucking foul. The grease made water bead off my hand. It was tacky too, and very difficult to manage.
So I grabbed the bar of saop and went to work.
You fucking Pringle bastards.
The bar of soap came away coated in grease as well, and would no longer wash. I had to turn the water to hot and massage the soap for five minutes to get it to the point where I could use it again. It took me an hour to get the fucking grease off my pucker. I shudder to think of what its doing INSIDE ME right now, but I will damned sure never eat that shit again.
Fucking Pringle bastards.
This is where the joke about “anal leakage” came from. its real. Fuck Pringles.
July 25, 2007 @ 8:25 am
July 25, 2007 @ 8:54 am
Yo dig, I’m workin on the pics now.
July 25, 2007 @ 8:55 am
How bad it gotta be for a bar of soap to not wash no more???
LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
July 25, 2007 @ 8:56 am
‘Yo dig, I’m workin on the pics now.’
Ok, dawg. Check your email too in…. bout 10.
July 25, 2007 @ 9:00 am
Oh yeah…. Beyonce bustin her ass.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RL34UDPmeDU
July 25, 2007 @ 9:03 am
What.The.Ever.Loving.Fuck?
July 25, 2007 @ 9:06 am
July 25, 2007 @ 9:10 am
Its so funny cause he sound so mad LOL.
FUCK Pringles!
July 25, 2007 @ 9:18 am
Potato chips ain’t that serious. Why the fuck are they eating them shits like it’s the cure for AIDS anyway?
July 25, 2007 @ 9:18 am
He has to be white if he was washing his ass with his bare ass hands !!!!
You don’t wipe your ass with your bare hands so why the fuck would you WASH your ass with your bare hands ? These fucking white people can “discover” America and land on the fucking moon but can’t discover a fucking washcloth…. Nasty bastards. Here goes my white people rant for today.
In addition to not using washcloths when they wash their asses, they also don’t wash their meat. They run that shit under the faucet and wash that shit just like they wash their “culos” ,”webos” and “chochas”…..
Then they wanna walk fucking barefoot in the SUBWAY ? Yeah … if you’ve ever been on a NYC subway you know what I am talking about. And they will squat and sit thier asses on any surface. Stand for the bus ??? oh no sir… imma sit on this concrete like I own this bitch because… I am white… and I fucking own the world so let me squat on the floor because the fucking world is my living room bitches.
Thats all that on my mind as far as white people are concerned.. for now…
more to come…
oh yeah, good morning !!!
July 25, 2007 @ 9:22 am
‘Thats all that on my mind as far as white people are concerned.. for now…’
I think that was quite enough, LOL.
July 25, 2007 @ 9:22 am
White people don’t use washrags. They use their bare hands.
July 25, 2007 @ 9:25 am
All white folks dont roll like that and I know black folks that dont use a rag either. Im just sayin.
July 25, 2007 @ 9:26 am
Taken from FOXsports website….
Warning: Spelling and grammar is fucked up!
‘Vick shoulda known not to do this in America, where a fuckin cracker will jump in front of a moving fuckin’ train to save the life of a poodle before they would give a black man dying of thirst a drink of water…. fuckin self righteous ass muthafuckas… shoulda known better vick, crackers love their fuckin dogs, dress them muthafuckas up, put jewlery on em, sleep in the same fuckin bed with em. Filthy fuckin animals, and these muthafuckas will just lay in the damn bed with them like it aint nothin…. these fuckin crackers kiss dogs on the GOTDAMN MOUTH!… THE GOTDAMN MOUTH… ole nasty ass dog tounge thats been lickin its own fuckin balls and the inside of a fuckin toilet bowl, and crackers will just put they gotdamn lips right up on it on some “whos a good boy!!… who’s a good boy!!!… YOU’RE A GOOD BOY!!!” its fuckin sickening, its fuckin disgusting. these fuckin despicable peices of shit will go out in the fuckin woods and shoot whatever fuckin wild animal they can find and then mount that shit up on the wall in their living room as a momento… but kill a dog and these fuckin peices of shit will go into WHITE RAGE!!!!!!!!! how dare you kill a dog. When black folks were dying in New Orleans you didn’t see this much outrage…. but let a few dogs get killed and white people LEAP into action.
fuckin disgustion’
July 25, 2007 @ 9:31 am
White people and their dogs.
July 25, 2007 @ 9:32 am
@ Chev…
I know. You wouldn’t wash your car with your bare hands so why would they wash their privates with their bare hands ? For such an “advanced” raced, you would think that they would know better. I just never understood that.
They also think that taking a shower the night before, makes them just as clean as if they took the shower that morning. Now I have done this before here and there but these mofo’s will do that 4 or 5 times a week and skip bathing altogether on the weekends talking about “I’m married”… oh yeah ???
That must be why the club is filled with so many young white married women wating to get pounded out by somebody that doesn’t smell like a porta potty.
July 25, 2007 @ 9:32 am
LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Damn. He mad too, LOL. Lotta anger going around on the internet LOL.
July 25, 2007 @ 9:33 am
Sohh sorry…
tryin to get these damn images up…
yeah dig, they’re gigantic as fuck.
Causing MAD problems.
July 25, 2007 @ 9:34 am
‘these mofo’s will do that 4 or 5 times a week and skip bathing altogether on the weekends talking about “I’m married”… oh yeah ???’
Am I stupid or does anyone else not get the correlation? LOL
July 25, 2007 @ 9:36 am
Willy - I know! LOL
The ones from the disposable were straight but them digital pictures were on some ‘we takin over’ shit
July 25, 2007 @ 9:37 am
I’m a dog lover and all that but I don’t put em on a pedestal ( all this while I just paid $334 for the vet because my dog has Mange
) but this is getting way too much attention. They act as if Vick was the first person dogfighting (if he was). Where the fuck have they been ?
Dogs get cruel treatment just like so many humans. Texas just killed a nigger yesterday… legally…. and these people are marching for dogs.
Don’t they have fucking jobs ?
July 25, 2007 @ 9:39 am
ihadnochoice:
When I played football in college, my first roommate would come from football practice,(mind you, this is southern Georgia, where the temperature sits at 100 degrees everyday during August) and change clothes…no shower, and keep it moving. Fucking disgusting. This dude would put on a white t-shirt and wear that bitch for a week straight. When he would take the shirt off, that shit would be a light gray. No lie.
I stayed in the dorm with him for 1 month. I couldn’t take it anymore. Fuckin filthy bastards.
July 25, 2007 @ 9:49 am
Now high school is where I got my first wind of these nasty bastards and they would do the same shit on my high school football team. My school was mostly white but all the black kids took showers after practice. If they didn’t, they would get harrased for being dirty. When I played basketball, we practiced in the morning before school and some of the white kids didn’t shower after practice and preffered to go the whole day smelling like a fucking jock strap. I went to an all boy high school so maybe they figured they had nobody to impress but hygiene has nothing to do with impressions…
and they’ve been dirty ever since.
I used to think it was because some of the white kids would be embarrased by being in the shower with the “better hung” brothers but as I got older I just realized that they are just dirty.
Its not a coincidence that they brought over dieseases from Europe that wiped out all the Indian.
Dirt is in their DNA.
But their women can suck a good one.
July 25, 2007 @ 9:54 am
LMAO! Stupid.
July 25, 2007 @ 9:57 am
Im mad…. You spent a minute thinking about that
July 25, 2007 @ 9:59 am
Leave it to you to take how filthy these Anglo-Saxons are to how good they suck a dick. You must be one of my cousins!
But I went to a 90% black high school, so I didn’t see any shit like that. But when I got to Georgia Southern, reality slapped the shit outta me.
White people are gross…the males are anyway. Walking round with no shoes or socks on is one of the nastiest things you can possibly do.
July 25, 2007 @ 10:02 am
Good morning All
This was distrubing, i luv me some pringles potato chips, obviously nt as much as this person did though LOL
July 25, 2007 @ 10:05 am
Man I am always thinking about white people….
taxes…
mortagage….
rent….
insurance….
police……
work…..
But they can’t stop me. I just went for my 3rd drug test yesterday. Nevermind the fact that I smoke on the way to work and will have the odor on me for a bit of the morning. My brother from another ( no really… this nigga looks just like me … my own mother mistakes us) took all 3 tests for me.
I was smoking a blunt while I was in the testing parking lot waiting for my homeboy.
Can’t beat that with a bat.
July 25, 2007 @ 10:06 am
Cec - Oh this person sooooooooo does not love Pringles.
July 25, 2007 @ 10:07 am
Ihadnochoice, you need your ass kicked for that LOL.
July 25, 2007 @ 10:09 am
@dig….LOL now thx to him ima be thinking twice when im at the store reaching for sour crem & onion
@IHNC i co sign with dig, u need ur butt kicked. u better be careful doing that
July 25, 2007 @ 10:09 am
Chevy Says:
July 25th, 2007 at 9:59 am e
Leave it to you to take how filthy these Anglo-Saxons are to how good they suck a dick. You must be one of my cousins!
—————-
God had to bless em with something. They can’t even stand in the fucking sun without thinking about dying…lol
What type of “alien” shit is that ?
July 25, 2007 @ 10:09 am
I was smoking a blunt while I was in the testing parking lot waiting for my homeboy.
Can’t beat that with a bat.
Got damn shame…..
July 25, 2007 @ 10:12 am
Cec, you buy the regular ones though, he talkin bout them fat free shits. IMO, anything fat free is the devil and if you eat that shit, you deserve to have your insides tormented just outta sheer retardation.
July 25, 2007 @ 10:13 am
Anything fat free either tastes horrible or is worse for you in some other aspect than ‘fat’ so you might as well just eat the regular shit, run a lap and call it a day LOL.
July 25, 2007 @ 10:16 am
Yea thats true…fat free anything is def not a good idea and is usually high in suntin else…which is why i just stick to the regs and try not to get outta hand. LOL Key word…TRY LMAO
July 25, 2007 @ 10:16 am
@CEC and DIG…
Imma do what I want on my terms. If you have rules to stop me, Imma find a way to do it my way. I was on probation for 4 years and never got drug tested… never. I’ve been smoking since I was 15 and never failed a drug test. I’ve taken about 10 of them in my life. From UPS to FED EX to the currnet job I’m at now. I ride all day with a 1/4 ounce in my car… hardly ever in the stash box. I’m just a sneaky fuck.You just gotta always remain one step ahead of these crackers. They ain’t used to that. Just wait til I finish these real estate classes if you really wanna watch a nigga buck the system. I’m still getting tax kickbacks from dependenst that I have in Haiti.
Fuck them…
July 25, 2007 @ 10:17 am
They run that shit under the faucet and wash that shit just like they wash their “culos” ,”webos” and “chochas”…..
July 25, 2007 @ 10:19 am
‘Imma do what I want on my terms.’
I see that, ole renegade ass.
July 25, 2007 @ 10:20 am
Usually fat free means high sodium. So your heart is gonna stop one way or another.
How about not eating a Pringle if you wanna remain free of the fat ?
Ever heard of … ummmmm…. FRUIT… maybe a fucking celery stick here and there….
I can’t eat a Pringle without finishing the box though.
July 25, 2007 @ 10:21 am
@IHNC
Just a rebel aint u. A real bad boy huh….gon head i aint mad atcha
July 25, 2007 @ 10:23 am
Usually fat free means high sodium. So your heart is gonna stop one way or another
Exactly…my theory is …y not enjoy it
July 25, 2007 @ 10:24 am
‘How about not eating a Pringle if you wanna remain free of the fat ?’
My sentiments exactly.
I dont really care for them shits though. They make my tongue go numb for some reason. Cant be having that
July 25, 2007 @ 10:26 am
Its not really about being a renegade. Its not like I am toting guns and robbing people. I pay my taxes. I’m a contributing member of society…. so let me get high…
Oh you wanna pay me minimum wage at $4.15 an hour…. ok… imma steal yo shit and sell it on MY TERMS.
So you wanna tax my dollar before I even smell it…. and then tax me again when I go to buy something…. ok…. imma get my social security number having cousins on my dependent list bitch… gimme my fucking money….
and then you wanna up my medical isurance by 122%…. Imma ad my 61 year old mother on there as a medical dependent… now you are gonna pay for her 3 monthly visits instead of my once every 6-8 month check up…..
And how does my mother end up with no fucking medical insurance in the fisrt fucking place ??? She is 61 years old and has been paying taxes in America for the past 35 years….
Don’t get me started…. :oops:
July 25, 2007 @ 10:27 am
‘They make my tongue go numb for some reason.’
You just have issues…
sausage
numbness
what else.
July 25, 2007 @ 10:31 am
*no hot chocolate on my screen*
(for once lol)
and um, i was raised with white folks and i use a rag. not all white folks dirty- some, yeah, ok they nasty as hell.. but i know niggas that dont brush they teeth for days and be in the spot for days @ a time with no shower- nasty folks and a just nasty
July 25, 2007 @ 10:32 am
One thing about NYC is that it teaches you how to hustle. I couldn’t live out here and do what I want to do if I didn’t have the know how of how to cut corners to keep money in my pocket and still keep a smile on my face. I’ve never been the drug selling type but I don’t agree to conforming either. Niggas wanna march when they see issues in the system… I just find ways around them because that how the white people do. I been watching how these crackers move for a very long time. We just like to brush them off as prviledged but there is a method to their madness. You have to watch them. Listen to what they say because they get over. I got the down payment for my Caddy with a fucking minority business grant… no fucking lie. Wrote that shit off as a business expense and I even get money back every year for my mileage that I use and its completely legal. I ain’t running from the system, I’m running towards it.
July 25, 2007 @ 10:33 am
@ IHNC
U are cracking me up but speaking the truth
July 25, 2007 @ 10:35 am
and um, i was raised with white folks and i use a rag. not all white folks dirty- some, yeah, ok they nasty as hell.. but i know niggas that dont brush they teeth for days and be in the spot for days @ a time with no shower- nasty folks and a just nasty
————-
That might be true but when you take 50 kids and 15 of them are black…. all 15 of the black kids wash…. only 15 of the white kids wash……. thats not a good percentage of dirty whites in the minds of a 14 year old black kid that has just gotten exposed to them. Its all about experience and my experience with white people is at least 53 percent of them are not clean or at least don’t lead consistently clean lives. They say we are stupid and I say they are dirty…
touche….
July 25, 2007 @ 10:37 am
But they give good brain so they are a ok in my book…
I”l bbe back… another white boy is buying today.
Gotta get em while I can…
BRB
July 25, 2007 @ 10:38 am
‘I’ve been smoking since I was 15 and never failed a drug test. I’ve taken about 10 of them in my life….I ride all day with a 1/4 ounce in my car… hardly ever in the stash box. I’m just a sneaky fuck.’
I’m convinced this nigga is my cousin. He has to be.
July 25, 2007 @ 10:42 am
ok yall ima go eat and run to an appt, ill holla lata
July 25, 2007 @ 10:47 am
Willy LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOO! It does!
July 25, 2007 @ 10:52 am
I got the down payment for my Caddy with a fucking minority business grant
Yeah Im gon need to talk to you about that in the back
July 25, 2007 @ 10:57 am
People, the pics from the weekend are up.
No drunk heffa jokes LOL.
July 25, 2007 @ 11:02 am
So your tongue goes numb after you eat sausage ???
You know lubrication would clear all that up….
July 25, 2007 @ 11:14 am
‘So your tongue goes numb after you eat sausage ???’
LMAOOOOOOO! No, man. I dont even eat sausage (unless its turkey sausage). Pringles make my tongue go numb.
Willy’s talkin bout weed. To me it tastes like sausage, LOL. (But his didnt. Guess thats that Nebraska green
)
July 25, 2007 @ 11:20 am
You don’t eat sausage ???
Turkey suasages are the smaller ones right ???
Well I guess size doesn’t matter… carry on…
July 25, 2007 @ 11:22 am
WOW !!! Was this my joint or what…
“Come into my life I got so much love to show you….
come into my life… boy I adore you…. ”
Damn… I’m old
July 25, 2007 @ 11:26 am
That wasnt that old…was it?
July 25, 2007 @ 11:27 am
‘You don’t eat sausage ???
Turkey suasages are the smaller ones right ???’
*staring into the camera*
Um……………………..no, LOL.
July 25, 2007 @ 11:30 am
“Come into my life I got so much love to show you….
come into my life… boy I adore you…. ”
Who sings it? I cant remember that song….
July 25, 2007 @ 11:33 am
Joyce Sims….
I remember it came out around the same time that Oran Juice came out because My brother had both them LP’s on wax….
July 25, 2007 @ 11:34 am
I can kinda remember the ‘come into my life’ but the melody gets lost after that.
You gon make me download it now.
Dammit.
LOL
July 25, 2007 @ 11:35 am
What was the name of that song….
July 25, 2007 @ 11:35 am
Its a hot ass song. I am surprised no one ever did it over.
July 25, 2007 @ 11:37 am
“Come Into My Life”….. downloading it now.
July 25, 2007 @ 11:48 am
Oh! Nah, I was never feelin this song like that. No shocker to me that it wasnt redone.